🏉A few months back, I shared a raw moment about my daughter, Allegra, and an "optional" rugby practice she chose to skip. I was frustrated because I know how small, unseen choices compound into big outcomes. I still believe that - it's the entire premise of our consulting work! And we know life has a way of teaching sharper lessons.
This past weekend, Allegra's team competed in a big Spring rugby tournament in North Carolina. Painfully, she wasn't among the 15 starters who took the field.
Granted, it's only her second season of the sport, but it still stung. She wants more playing time. As a parent, you feel every missed opportunity. And walking the sidelines and talking to some of the first-string parents opened my eyes wider.
These girls aren't just talented; they're obsessed in the best way:
Meal-prepping their own high-performance nutrition for the week, packing grab-and-go fuel like pros. Staying out back until 9pm, throwing rugby passes against the garage with a rebound ball, refining technique in the dark. The team captain, a D1 Ivy League recruit as a high school junior, hitting the gym every morning before school starts.
This isn't coach-mandated. No one's tracking reps or posting selfies. It's pure internal drive. The kind we study in high performers across industries: CEOs, athletes, entrepreneurs. Passion and grit aren't optional for elite levels - it's the separator.
I can't manufacture that hunger for Allegra. I can only model it, support it, and create environments where it has space to grow. And I have to accept that wanting it more than she does won't make it happen.
The original post was about noticing who shows up when it's not required. This weekend drove it home: the starters chose the work long before the tryout was posted, or the tournament schedule was published, and way before college scouts appeared.
Recommended by LinkedIn Championships Are Forever Fentriss Winn 4 months ago Hiring Athletes: A Father Watching His Daughter Grow… Kim Taylor 6 months ago Meditations of an Army Ranger: How to be a Good… JC Glick 7 years ago
In business, it's the same silent audition:
Who invests in their craft outside the 9-5? Who reads the extra report, experiments on their own time, mentors without credit? Who builds habits when the leader isn't looking?
Those are the ones who earn the starting spot - on the field, in the org chart, in life.
Small choices still compound. Over time, they reveal character, build reliability, and create unfair advantages.
P.S. Shoutout to the parents raising these young women. You're quietly shaping not just athletes, but future leaders who understand that excellence is a daily, private decision.
What unseen habits are separating your top performers right now? And if you don't know, how can our team help you illuminate and replicate them?
NC Tourney, Day 1 - undefeated!